making the most of my transition

After many months of rehabilitation, my mother had recovered as best she could, and I was pleased to be there for her and my family. Although she was physically challenged, she remained positive and lighthearted.

I’d spend my days taking care of mum, helping dad in the family business, working part time as a teller in a bank, and of a night, I’d started teaching beginners yoga classes at the local community hall. It was a far cry from the spiritually rich Buddhist monastery, but my vision was to bring something special to the isolated town, something that may help us all cope better with life.

My intention was to see how the yoga felt, and how it was received in the community, and if all good, I would aim to go back to England to complete teacher training. And, the magic was, that in sharing the gift of yoga and meditation, I was helping myself as well.

I could have given up many times, quite often no one would turn up at all and I would go home disheartened and confused.

but, there was something inside of me that kept believing, trusting and honouring this path.

Over the months that followed, classes began to grow in numbers and I was teaching more regularly. It was delightful to see students greeting me with their yoga mats, smiles and offering welcomed feedback on their practice. I felt I was doing something right.

In the meantime, I’d met a guy, and we began hanging out. Janus was 7 years younger than me, from a large family of a different culture and we enjoyed each other’s company. I was not quite ready to settle down, as I needed to finish what I had started with yoga, and get the necessary qualifications required for the long term.

So the time had come for me to return to London and complete the yoga teacher training, as I’d saved enough money for the course, and I was certain this was my destiny. In the meantime, just so happens, Janus became engaged to another girl. That’s how it rolled.

I journeyed back to England, successfully completed my teacher training, and loved every minute of it. So on completion of my training, I came back to the small town, and when the engagement inevitably broke off, I reconnected with Janus.

Time flew by, one thing led to another, and in no time we bought our first home. All was dandy, I was working with Janus in his family business, and teaching yoga a few evenings a week. I recall the night I was teaching to a large gathering at a Salvation Army hall, incense was burning, sacred oms where being chanted and the vibe was just so beautiful. I had hired this particular hall because of its size, and location, but as it happens, I was asked to leave the premises by the owners, because in their own words, they accused me of being a ‘cult leader’.

So, with that, I sourced other halls, parks and schools to offer classes from. I felt the fire in me, I was not going to give up, and I knew that if I just kept going all would be revealed. Indeed it was, I found a place to lease in the Main Street, a lovely room in a delightful old heritage listed building with a staircase, polished timber floorboards, graceful windows and a sunny balcony. I set it all up as an inviting space for all to retreat to.

My intention was to create a sacred space where anyone could just come in, relax, let go of the noise and busyness of the outside world and just be. I adored scenting the room with sweet smelling incense, Himalayan prayer flags, soft candles and music that soothes the soul.

I was beginning to realise the blessing that I had found in yoga, both for me and for all the people who were touched by it. And, for that, I was just so grateful.

Janus and I got married when I was 6 months pregnant with our first born. I knew I was having a boy, not because anyone told me, just because I felt it. So, I made the baby cot up with fresh blue linen and brought our baby boy home from the hospital.

wow! what an amazing experience.

  • pregnancy
  • birthing
  • nursing
  • and being a mother


I didn’t know I had it in me. I’d never even held a baby before, in fact, I never thought of myself as maternal at all.

words truly fail to describe the divinity of motherhood.

So many new experiences in this transition. The universe had called me back home to Australia to help care for mum, my will kept the yoga alive, Cupid called in, I was guided to fulfill teacher training in the U.K, and I was gifted the greatest blessing of all, being a mother.

In all honesty, I didn’t particularly love where I was living, it was dry, harsh, rural, inland country and can you believe a 5 hour drive to the beach? However, when we could, once or twice a year, we’d take a family holiday by the seaside to renew and refresh.

i thought, this is where i am, and i’m going to make the most of it.

 To read the complete story start here, two, three, four, five   or keep reading 



Published in memoirs

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