So, I’m a writer. Oh, you are too?
I recently read a book on writing.
It was interesting.
It taught me nothing.
Someone, anyone, can tell you how to write but it won’t mean anything until you actually put your thoughts down/recorded/on paper/somewhere. You see where I’m going here?
Writing isn’t easy.
There are not really ‘rules’ to being a writer. You have to yearn to put that ink on paper. Desire the ability to capture an audience, describe and story-tell.
I didn’t realize I wanted to be a writer until my grandmother gave me my first journal. I was about ten years old. She told me, “Write everything down Kate. Because someday you might forget”. The irony in that is, my grandmother now suffers from late stage dementia.
if the motivation was real before, it’s ten fold now.
Since that first journal, writing has consumed me. Often times, I have spouts of highly creative moments where I can stay up all night and finish that book waiting to be published. Those moments where you say to yourself– “heh, yeah my life needs a soundtrack” (cue cool song).
And on the other hand, when I have terrible, brain-eating, soul-consuming bouts of writer’s block. Those are the parts of being a writer that suck. When you overcome those moments, like I am right now, then you finally see what the struggle is all about. It feels so good, you want to yell from a mountaintop! (I’m just imagining what it will feel like when my first book is actually published)
I once read a statement that writer’s have a high chance of suicide. I sort of chuckled out loud, because I’ve been in those dark waters before, so it’s sort of true. But then I got to thinking, but why is that true? Because I let it be true.
You see, writing, is nothing like any ordinary job. You are the most critical of your own words. There can be a sentence of pure genius one minute, and the next, you are completely re-structuring it, breaking it down, and making it better the next minute (because obviously it wasn’t before).
as a writer, you often self destruct before anything is even constructed.
Of course, there is denial. Lots of denial. Your writing isn’t good enough, try again. Try again, again. It’s easy to become burnt out with constant (not always wanted) feedback. The publishers, the agents, the media… the judgement of your truths. But through it all,
you have to keep writing, because this is what makes you a writer.
and a writer’s story, never dies.