Q. Are you satisfied? 

A. No, I am starving for money, thirsty for love, and pining for the attention of a lust crazed  man who happens to be hard, chiseled, loving yet lunging for my throat. I want to be on a beach in California or Florida soaking up the sunshine before she bursts us all into flames. I want to sip sangria on the beaches of Barcelona until I can’t see the sunset or hear the waves crashing upon the shore, like a dog lapping water on a sunny day. Foolishly happy, appeased by natural means. I want to feel alive again. I want to be drawn to Knowledge like a spider to it’s first trapped victim. I would love nothing more than to fall asleep in the arms of a flawless man who caresses my thigh with thick fingers before he plunges them deep into the core of my being; into the sweet spot coated by this hard exterior of milk chocolate. 

I am unsatisfied and I wish to achieve all my desires so I can truly understand that money does not buy happiness, money buys everything the mind can imagine except the very essence of its’ being; calamity, joy, peace. I want to experience these truths first hand so I can share the wealth with the world. Wouldn’t it be perfect to relish in every moment of life, enjoy secret moments of bliss amidst a chaotic, fulfilling lifestyle?

 I want to admit the deep truths that haunt us all, yet excite me. Forging goosebumps on my skin and a thrill into my pulse. We will all die one day, so what is the point of living an extravagant life full of epic moments when the instant you take your last breath, you’ll forget it all? I am satisfied with my life, but I am not satisfied with the living. The creatures who aimlessly wander this earth are never fulfilled and their energy is so easily absorbed when you’re empathetic beyond reason. It’s draining, it’s exhausting, it depletes every fiber in ones being.

 An unspoken wish for death to come knocking too soon is what we all truly desire, yet wish to have everything before it amounts to nothing so that we can experience life to the fullest. So why is it that the most affluent, the most rich and well off people often meet their untimely demise with depression, anxiety and other afflictions that cause the mind to riot? Would monetary success diminish the Soul’s identity? It’s a question that we all ask ourselves at one time or another.

So, once again, are you satisfied? I would say yes. We have everything we could wish for and more, yet we all answer this question with no, I could have this or that and be much more happy, yet when we get it we still want more.. Human nature isn’t designed to look outside of itself and find happiness or achievement; the ultimate purpose of our lives is to realize that we already have everything we could ever need. A mind for thinking deeply, a body to get us to and fro’ and a society to draw inspiration and questions from. Questions that can only be answered when one peers into their own soul and sees the beauty of all creation lying there- frozen in time, cast in shadow yet bathed in Light. 

Published in I'm not sure., life lessons, material things, poems, sex & love
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